So, I came across this article here just a few moments ago, and found myself sighing resignedly. "Why?" you might ask. Well, here's why.
About a couple of weeks ago, I went for coffee with my mum and we took Morgan with us in her pram. ON our way back home,we walked past the playgrounds in Paola. The swings and other play things all seemed in good working order, and as if they have only just been installed. Excellent! However, as we walked towards the public toilets, the stench of urine that greeted us only grew stronger the closer we got.
Stupidly enough, the opening hours were something like 9am - 3pm, if I remember correctly. This means that whoever happens to need to go pee or poop after those hours will most likely do so just outside the public toilets' closed doors, thus leading to the filth and stench to flourish.
Oh, did I mention that the toilets are right opposite the doors of the Paola Government-owned school?
Not to mention the fact that yes, in spite of all the hoo-haa this article pretends to be concerned with, if you look on the side, you'll find plenty of similarly-themed articles written over the past years. This, to me, indicates that every so often the government/local councils pretend to give a fuck about the state of the equipment installed in the playgrounds just to shut people up. Nothing ever changes.
And what is this bullshit about making them "as safe as necessary"? Clearly, the people involved don't have children of their own, otherwise they'd realise that even if you were to wrap your child up in bubble wrap and make sure every single object around them is also wrapped up in bubble wrap, has no sharp edges/corners and is made out of the safest materials ever, said child will still find a way to get hurt/hurt someone else with said objects. Hell, think of prisoners and the ingenious ways they come up with the create makeshift weapons! THINK OF MACGYVER DAMN IT!
"As safe as necessary" to me, reads as "We can't be bothered so we'll just give a lick of paint over the rusty bits to hide them up and keep parents off our backs."
I now sit back and wait for them to prove me wrong - honestly. I hope they manage.
When a child is born, their birth needs to be registered within 5 working days, according to Maltese Laws. In the eventuality that both parents are to be listed on the birth certificate, one or both parents would need to physically go to the Public Registry Office - located on the 1st floor at Evans Building, Merchants Street Valletta - with BOTH parents' Photo ID (National ID Card or Passport).
If the child's parents are married, and the marriage occurred abroad, the original marriage certificate needs to be taken along - and this needs to be in either Maltese or English.
Should there be a legal separation or annulment, the original contact/court sentence documents need to also be taken along.
If the child is born out of wedlock, you're better off making a phone call before you go to the Public Registry Office. Their contact numbers are 22209100 and 22220920.
The opening hours are Mon-Fri 07:30 - 14:00. On Wednesdays, they are also open between 15:00 and 18:00 and on Saturday between 07:30 and 11:00.
At hospital, you're given a form on which the midwife assisting your birth giving process writes down the time and date of your baby's birth, along with your name and ID Card number and some other details, and ultimately signs it. On that same form, you then get to write down your baby's name(s) separated by commas ( , ) unless you want all names written down to appear on your child's ID Card when they grow up (e.g. If your child is to be called Mark Anthony Charles Philip Elton, but you only want Mark Anthony to be on their ID Card when he grows up, you'd need to write Mark Anthony, Charles, Philip, Elton) as well as some of your own personal details (and the father's, if his name is to appear).
Now, this is where the fun part (i.e. Confusion) begins. If the child's father is to be left out, in spite of knowing who he is, he is very tastelessly listed as "Unknown Father" - however this _can_ be changed at a later date. How? That is what I'm trying to find out.
When I called the Registry people, I spoke to a manager who told me the Father would have to speak to a lawyer and get an Act issued from Court that would then enable the Birth Certificate to be changed.
On the other hand, when I physically went to register Morgan's birth, I asked about this again and got told a different story. _This time_, I was told that both parents would need to physically go to a _Notary_ along with the child's birth certificate and get the Notary to draw up some legal document that will allow the Birth Certificate to be changed.
Since I have no intention of wasting money talking to lawyers and/or Notaries needlessly, I'm going to ask about this another 3 times. The first option to be mentioned to me three times in total will be what I consider to be correct information until proven otherwise.
Oh, and you have to pay €2.33 as a registration fee. The reasoning behind this is a mystery to me. I wonder how impossible life would be for someone whose parent[s] opt not to register their birth because they don't agree with said charge. I know it is a highly unlikely scenario, but can you imagine never having existed to the world? Location would probably be key to how easy/difficult life can be for you.
The birth certificate can then be picked up within 10 working days from the Public Registry Office, or requested online via www.certifikati.gov.mt. There seems to be yet another charge to obtain the actual birth certificate via the website. If you request just an extract, the charge is €2.33, but if you request the full birth certificate, the charge is € 9.32.
Since there are a few details I still need to obtain confirmation about, as mentioned earlier, I will write up Part 2 of this blog once the certificate itself is ready for collection.
Everyone enjoys public holidays, right? Well, not really.
Some of us are unfortunate enough to have been born on the most awkward dates ever. Let's have a look and see why:
New Year's Day - 1st of January
Well, that pretty much screwed up your mum's plans for the previous evening for a very long time. It also means that your name - if not your face - landed you in newspapers and/or TV from day 1. This year, one lady I used to metaphorically bump into at my doc's clinic was one of the New Year's New Mums. My own mother called me to tell me about it, since I don't want local TV... nor any TV really, anyway. No more shall I be amused by said Lady's animal-print, skinny fit, bright pink, uber-furry wardrobe. Beautiful woman - bad taste in clothing. Anyway.
This means that later on in life, you will rarely get to celebrate your birthday as just that. Also, it will make it awkward for your friends to attend as they are bound to have other social engagements.
St Paul's Feast - February 10th
Yes, it is awesome to always have the day off for your birthday - however you are almost guaranteed that your birthday will be rainy. Plus, if you parents are 'those kind of people' - you're likely to be named Paul, Paula, Pauline etc.
Valentine's Day - 14th February
If you happen to be in a relationship on your birthday, you're bound to only get the one gift from your partner, as opposed to two, like everyone else does. If on the other hand you're single, you will be made aware of that fact every single year. Your friends will be unlikely to make it to your birthday's celebrations and getting time off work will be a nightmare as all the couples will have taken up the available hours off.
You also get to be called Valentina/ Valentino if your parents deem it befitting.
Leap Year - 29th February You only get to celebrate your birthday on its actual date once every four years, and will have to put up with a lifetime of people making remarks about how you're actually 1/4th your age e.g. If you're 16, you're really only 4 years old.
St Joseph's Feast - 19th March
Again, chances are, you'll be called Joseph, Josephine, Josef, Josefa, or any other variant of the name.
Any time between February and April - Lent & Carnival
If your birthday occurs during lent, you might be screwed. It depends entirely on how strict your parents are in their making you give up sweets during that time of the year.
Fine, you get to have a fancy dress party should Carnival happen on your birthday. However, it can become old very quickly. Especially when your friends don't show up for your birthday celebrations because they are busy partying elsewhere. April Fool's - 1st of April
You'll be the butt of the same old jokes over and over again every time someone finds out about it.
Any time between March & April - Our Lady of Sorrows, Good Friday, Easter
Your birthday will be of secondary importance, and you'll be restricted food-wise as a lot of catering establishments avoid meat on the first 2 holidays I mentioned. If your birthday happens to be Easter Sunday, you'll have a positive aspect to it - lots of chocolate eggs.
Again, though, it will be a nightmare to take time off work.
Any day in May, June or July
May is full of various feasts - the greatest risk you run is being called Mario or Maria or any other variation throughout this month. It also happens to be the period where your social l life as a student preparing for their O/A/Intermediate level exams will vanish. If you're unlucky enough, there will be the village feast causing noise pollution as you attempt to pull an all-nighter and study. This also means that once you start working, you'll be unlikely to get time off for your birthday and once you have children of your own, you'll spend your birthday telling them off for procrastinating and to study.
Similarly, both June and July have a long list of village feasts involved, so you'll be more likely to be named after a saint. There aren't that many issues you'll come across though - you're just more likely to share your birthday with half a dozen acquaintances.
St Maria's Feast - 15th August Good luck getting the day off work! Unless you're one of those lucky ones who work for a business that closes down for a few days round about that time. Again, Mario or Maria is most likely your name. You'll be unlikely to manage to book yourself a few days away from home - at least not without paying an arm and a leg for it! Your friends are also likely to have made plans elsewhere so they won't be around to help you celebrate. Late September
September is a good month if I say so myself! [This is where I mentally wave at my fellow Virgos out there.] The issue with this month is mainly the weather being unreliable. Oh, and it is also Back To School month. Which can be somewhat stressful! [p.s. Late August/Early September-born people are proof that their parents had a really good Festive season]
October & November - the most relaxed months of them all
The only issues I can see with October is if your birthday is close to Halloween - as a lot of people will have already made other plans and won't be around to help you celebrate. Other than that - huzzah!
December
Heh. You're likely to get half as much gifts as everyone else It will also be the case that your birthday will eternally have a Xmas theme. If you're born really close to Xmas, you're risking being called Noel/Noelle or even worse, Natalino or Natalia. A smartass or two might ask if you were born in a manger and try to be punny - but thankfully for you, there aren't that many smartasses around.
