It has almost been 3 hours since I left my grandma's home. I have so far texted my sister 4 times to ask if everything is well, and to remind her that Morgan is due to have her nappy changed and to be fed at 6:30pm.
My phone's alarm clock went off at 6:30 in fact... Which is when my guilt rocketed sky high. I should be at home, feeding her right now - not sitting at the hairdresser's still, with hair dye in my hair.
I am going through something akin withdrawal symptoms. The fact that a Pagan group I'm part of posted an entry on Facebook concerning The Morrigan doesn't help.
WAIT!! Hairdresser summons! 'Tis time to rinse my hair! Finally!
Ok, false alarm. I have to wait a while longer it seems.
So yeah. As I was saying. I keep thinking I should be at home right now. I can't wait til I'm with Morgan!
A woman walked in with her son. She caused me to miss Morgan even more. Almost to the point of wanting to run out of the shop.
I know I have to get used to being apart - I will have to once I get back to work. The mere notion of it makes me shudder.
Ok! Here we go!
*insert hold music here*
On a side note, whenever I'm waiting, I always end up singing "Figaro" in my head.
*end hold moosic*
Aaaaand done!
So this is where I run home as fast as my legs can carry me.
*insert Benny Hill moosic here*
And now, I'm finally home.
My mum just shook her head sadly at me, resigned. I just said that now they surely will not be able to lose me.
*points at pic* See what I mean?
Now, I'm off to cuddle the living crap out of my Fairy.
Shortly after I found out I was pregnant, I realised my flat - the one I loved and called home for the previous couple of years, was not appropriate for a family. It was a Single Person's flat.
I lived on the second floor in an awesome corner-plot apartment with the nicest landlord ever. I did have some noisy neighbours but waging musical wars on them usually did the trick. By musical wars, I mean pointing powerful speakers towards the front door and blasting music at them. Good music with the appropriate message.
I needed to find a place that was closer to my family - within walking distance preferably. I needed to be able to be closer so that it would not pose issues with babysitting arrangements - especially when I return back to work. I also wanted us to be able to go by and visit without having it be an Epic Journey.
The place needed to be bigger - big enough for two and a half people to live in, At that point, I was still under the impression things were fine with the ex, and that he'd be moving in. I wanted it to be Our Home. A place small enough to be able to keep in good order, but big enough to allow us a certain degree of privacy. Living with a partner doesn't mean you have to be his/her shadow 24/7.
The new place also had to be on the Ground Floor preferably. This way it wouldn't be too much of a hassle to go places alone with Creature and taking the pram/pushchair with us. It would also mean less safety concerns.
After a couple of months searching for a new home, I finally found it. The ideal house.
There was just one issue...
This, is the Pink Disney Princess nightmare.
Don't get me wrong, I like the furniture in it. It's just that... well... I don't do pink. Unless it is my hair we're talking about. And I don't do Disney Princesses.
Seeing as it is still unknown whether Creature is a boy or a girl, I've pretty much left the room as it was for the time being. Once s/he is born, I'll ask for permission to carry out some modifications.
I want to get rid of all the Disney Princesses crap - and if it turns out Creature is a girl, I'd like to hang up some tasteful Fairy pictures such as this, and this. Cicely Mary Barker did some pretty awesome stuff! I might leave the walls pink, we'll see. Though I'd prefer them to be a light lilac. If, on the other hand, Creature is a boy, I'll probably go for mythical beasts - such as this, or this! Should Creature be a boy, I will definitely ask for permission to paint the walls - I really don't want my son to grow up in a pink room. If I manage to, I'd wish to paint the ceiling a sky blue and have clouds there. I've always dreamt of having a Sky ceiling.
One thing I really like in Nurseries are trees - there are quite a few cool examples online - such as this room, and this other one too! I probably won't bother for the time being though - once I know whether we'll be extending our stay in this place by another year, I'll decide whether to go for it or not.
I'd love to hear your ideas and opinions! What would you have wanted your room to be like growing up? What have you opted to decorate your child[ren]'s room with? What are your plans for future kidlets?
Those of you who have been following the blog will know that I have been trying to decide whether to baptise Creature into the Roman Catholic church or not. I've mentioned this topic previously in this blog, as well as this other one here. In both rites discussed, the need for Godparents became apparent.
Whilst I await a reply back from the Maltese Diocese as to how one should go about organising the Baptism of a baby - especially one born to a Single Parent - I've decided to look into what being a Godparent is all about.
Well, seeing as the Roman Catholic Church is pretty strict when it comes to guidelines, it means that some potentially awesome Godparents would not qualify by the Church's standards. The following is derived from the Cathecism of the Catholic Church:
"CCC 1253
Baptism is the sacrament of faith. But faith needs the community of believers. It is only within the faith of the Church that each of the faithful can believe. The faith required for Baptism is not a perfect and mature faith, but a beginning that is called to develop. The catechumen or the godparent is asked: “What do you ask of God’s Church?” The response is: “Faith!” CCC 1254
For all the baptised, children or adults, faith must grow after Baptism. For this reason the Church celebrates each year at the Easter Vigil the renewal of baptismal promises. Preparation for Baptism leads only to the threshold of new life. Baptism is the source of that new life in Christ from which the entire Christian life springs forth. CCC 1255
For the grace of Baptism to unfold, the parents’ help is important. So too is the role of the godfather and godmother, who must be firm believers, able and ready to help the newly baptised – child or adult on the road of Christian life. Their task is a truly ecclesial function (officium). The whole ecclesial community bears some responsibility for the development and safeguarding of the grace given at Baptism."
What does this mean?
This means that the Godparents chosen must be baptised Roman Catholics. In certain Dioceses it is sufficient for just one to be Roman Catholic - however the other Godparent must be a baptised Christian within some other Christian tradition [e.g. Protestant, Greek Orthodox, Russian Orthodox etc]
Traditionally, the role of Godparents is to be the Guides that allow the Baptised Child to advance through their Religious Life and mature into Roman Catholics in their own right.
This link will take you to the Code of Canon Law, which details the criteria Godparents must meet.
What about the Saining Ritual?
Well, seeing as Paganism does not have a fixed structure, due to it not being an Organised Religion, really and truly it does not matter what faith the Godparents chosen belong to, as long as they can be Positive Role Models who can be of positive influence within their symbolic parenthood. It is very important to keep in mind that there is a huge difference between being Spiritual and being Religiousin this day and age.
This means that should you wish, you can have anyone filling in the role - be they male, female, transgendered, Pagan, Buddhist, Christian, Jewish - as long as you feel they can do the job.
Do you recall the opening scene from Sleeping Beauty? A grand hall, with the King and Queen on their thrones, presenting their newborn daughter to their guests, all of whom bestow gifts to the newborn. Along flutter in the Fairy Godmothers Flora, Fauna and Merryweather who too bestow their gifts upon the child. Cue evil Witch throws a tantrum for not being invited and curses Princess Aurora, and the story takes off from there.
The idea of having that sort of introduction has always appealed to me. Yes, Baptism is something that kinda has the same purpose - but that is solely religious followed by a reception, so to me, people just attend for the sake of it without giving it too much thought. For the most part,they are spectators. As previously mentioned, I have yet to decide whether this is something I will go for.
One ceremony I know I do wish to hold is a Saining Ritual. I can see your blank faces staring perplexed at me in my mind's eye. Worry not, I'll explain what I mean.
Different religions have different Rites of Passage. As Pagans, we too have our own versions of such rites that mark the milestones of a person's life. In Wicca, the Baptism equivalent is known as Wiccaning. I don't consider myself Wiccan though as it is too restrictive a term for my liking. Which is why I opt to call myself Pagan. Anyway, semantics.
"What does it involve though??" you might be wondering.
Well, it is a ritual that involves presenting the newborn child to society, and to the Divine, without committing them to a particular religion. And it tends to also involved a naming ceremony. It is not a legally recognised ceremony in Malta [for now, anyway. Who knows, things may change.] however I find it suits my idea of what it all should be like.
The basics of the rite itself are pretty standard - but like other ceremonies [think of Weddings, for example] it can be personalised. I have been discussing it with a good friend of mine and doing some research as to who has to be involved and to get ideas to design the ceremony myself. I have come across quite a few interesting ideas, however it is still in the works. You do need to have Baby present, of course. Sometimes a celebrant leads the ceremony - in this case, s/he would be referred to as the High Priest/ess or alternatively, the parent of opposite sex to Baby can act out the role. It is also standard practice to have Godparents present who pledge themselves to being present throughout the child's life to provide support and guidance. By no means is this a legally-binding position - however to me, a person's word is much more binding than any legal contracts. In certain versions of the ceremony, you get to have 4 people representing the elements who are also actively involved in the rite itself. In other versions, they are not required and the High Prriest/ess calls the elements.
Ok, looks like I may have lost you there.
Whenever a ritual is being played out in Paganism, it is customary to invoke the elements. Since Paganism is an earth-based belief, and has no need for stone/wooden buildings to act as places of worship, it is ideal to create a 'Sacred Space'. It becomes a place which is no place, and a time which is no time. All the invocation entails is pretty much to ask the Four Elements of Air, Earth, Fire and Water to be present in order to provide protection and guidance. The circle itself does not need to physically exist - it can merely be visualised. It allows you to separate yourself from Daily Life and leave all negativity outside of that serene place you will have created for yourself and any others joining you.
There is also an invitation sent out to the God and Goddess to be witnesses of it all, and to provide protection and guidance to all people within the sacred space. Lost you again, have I?
Ok, picture this. The Yin-yang. Th God and The Goddess are neither 100% good nor 100% evil - for in nature there is no such absolute. Therefore you get the white bit of the Yin-Yang sporting a black dot, and the black bit sporting a white dot. Together, these two halves make up one symbol . In the same fashion, the God and the Goddess make up The One.. The All.. The Source of all that ever was, is and will be, Now, you might still be confused as to which God and Goddess I'm referring to. Picture a disco ball. All the tiny mirrors that make up the ball are all the different Goddesses ever mentioned and/or worshipped throughout history of mankind. They all represent different aspects of the same entity. The same symbolism can be applied to the God.
As you may have deducted from the chants I have posted - unlike its Catholic equivalent, Saining would involve singing - and yes, sometimes dancing and drumming and all sorts of merrymaking. Prayer does not have to be serious business - after all, if the Divine didn't have a sense of humour they would not have made sex such a hilarious process to have to go through.
Last but not least, the people you need to have around are the Guests - to which after both the parent[s] and the Godparents commit themselves to protecting and assisting the newborn child throughout life, the child him/herself is presented. All people involve get to wish something on behalf of the child, or make a promise to the child that they must stick to.
As with all rituals, Saining would then be followed by lots of delicious food and drinks and socialising. This is where the 'reception' bit would kick in, basically.
It will happen - it is purely a matter of deciding when,and who to involve. I understand some people might not feel comfortable attending a rite which doesn't belong to their faith. I only hope that whoever does show up, will take the same attitude I adopt whenever attending a Wedding or a Funeral myself. Although I am not of the Catholic Faith, I still show up out of respect for the person involved.
