Sometimes I feel my brains turning into a mix of jelly, poop, formula milk and baby drool. There are times throughout the day when I miss adult conversation, and the company of a peer where non-baby-related topics can be discussed.
Inevitably I will end up talking about baby stuff at some point. Try as hard as I may, I can't help it. I just miss my old self.
I just had quite a stressful nappy change & bottle experience. I didn't get much sleep last night (3 hours which felt like 5 minutes). I had every intention of taking Morgan out for her first stroll, however after feeding her this morning we both fell asleep. I managed to grab an hour or so of shut-eye. It was then time to wake up for her next nappy change and feed.
I switched on the bottle warmer and went to change Morgan's nappy. All was well so far. Nappy got changed easily, and so I then put her back in bed for a few moments whilst I go get her bottle. I then realised I had forgotten to put her tights back on, so before feeding her, I put her back on the Nappy Changing Table with every intention of just undoing her sleepsuit's bottom half and putting on the tights. Quite an easy job. Alas, it was not to be.
I realised she had pooped her freshly changed nappy already. Crap.
Sorry. Couldn't help the pun.
Anyway.
Off came every layer covering her bottom half. Which is when Morgan decided to start wriggling all over the place as I tried to clean her up. Frustration levels rising, I tried to deal with it whilst hearing criticism coming from my grandma's end. Knowing she means well, I refrained from commenting at first. That didn't last, which is how I became snappy.
Morgan's wriggling meant her socks got dirtied and had to be changed. With that out of the way, I finally managed to get her dressed, and started the feed. Whilst feeding her, I realised we're nearly out of nappies so I contacted my bro asking him to ask my mum to get some on the way back home. Hopefully she'll remember, otherwise I'll be screwed.
Once the feed was over, I was faced with trying to put on a cardigan on Morgan as her sleepsuit's sleeves kept acting like short sleeves and I figured she'd end up feeling too cold cos of that. Obviously that didn't go smoothly either as I couldn't get her 2nd arm in the bloody sleeve. By this time, patience was running thin.
A short struggle was had, and eventually the damned sleeve was conquered. Which is when Morgan grabbed my finger and looked at me calmly. That is precisely when I had a mini-breakdown and apologised to her for getting impatient.
I now am laying next to her in bed - on my stomach, nonetheless! First time I've been in this position since May! Morgan is half asleep, and so am I - but I can't sleep yet. There are bottles to be sterilised and prepared, and I have to cook. Blah.
This is me venting, by the way.
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Showing posts with label shit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shit. Show all posts
Saturday, 18 February 2012
Monday, 2 January 2012
What a shitty situation!
"Oh shit."
Probably one of the most overused phrases in this day and age.
Gods know how many times it has been uttered so far throughout my lifetimes. Come to think of it, there are quite a lot of fecal references in popular expressions - "Same Shit Different Day" "I feel like crap" "Shit happens" "Bullshit!" and so on and so forth.
Well, shit will be happening, I'm afraid.In copious amounts, and at the least convenient of times. Such a labour, for example.
During a pre-natal class, the midwife was describing the various bits and pieces that will get attached to you, including a catheter. There was mention of labour possibly taking hours - and in my head I couldn't help but wonder "So the catheter takes care of your needing to pee... but after spending hours pushing your guts out, who is to say you won't end up pooping the bed you're on?" A disgusting thought, sure. But a realistic one, You can't really do anything other than push and push and then push it some more. A-la-la-la-la-long a-la-la-la-la-long long li long long long! Err. Sorry about that. Momentarily got distracted!
Anyway. Back to this crappy topic.
I started doing some research about what can be done to minimise the chances of any 'accidents' happening during childbirth, and the first answers I came across weren't reassuring at all. Most forums just had an "oh don't you worry about it, the medical staff is used to it and you will be too busy otherwise to be embarrassed" kind of approach.
Others seemed to imply that your body goes through this massive bowel evacuation movement a few days before labour. Others still advised to switch to liquids and watery soups the moment you notice you're about to go into labour to ensure that you evacuate the pipes before it is too late.
Nope, still not a satisfactory answer to me.
I also stumbled across someone mentioning Castor Oil. Upon looking this up, it turns out that it is believed Castor Oil can help induce labour if Baby is overdue. And this is done by triggering bowel cramps, thus making it an effective laxative. Upon reading further though, it turns out that Castor Oil can cause - and I quote - " painful cramps, fecal incontinence and explosive diarrhoea. Its action can go on for hours, sometimes unpredictably and powerfully causing an involuntary bowel movement at inconvenient locations and during sleep" [quoted from Wikipedia]. As effective as it may be, I'd rather not risk it.
Now I'm aware that different countries might vary slightly in their methods, so I decided to ask some local friends of mine who work in the medical industry. It has been confirmed to me that an enema is given to minimise the chances of things getting pretty stinky. Awesome! That has taken a shitload of concern off my mind.
A by-product possibility of labour is piles. A nurse friend of mine suggested to pack some piles cream in advance, just in case.
Once labour is over and done with, and Baby is born, it will be his/her shit you will have to put up with. Surprisingly enough, Baby Poo comes in a wide variety of colour, textures and smells. Yes, disturbing, and revolting. But, the next few years of your [and my] life will be so full of it that I needed to know the differences to be able to tell if something is wrong or not. Google, my old friend, helped me out with that. Here is a guide to different Baby Poo - opt for text-only, or full-blown visuals! Enjoy!
Probably one of the most overused phrases in this day and age.
Gods know how many times it has been uttered so far throughout my lifetimes. Come to think of it, there are quite a lot of fecal references in popular expressions - "Same Shit Different Day" "I feel like crap" "Shit happens" "Bullshit!" and so on and so forth.
Well, shit will be happening, I'm afraid.In copious amounts, and at the least convenient of times. Such a labour, for example.
During a pre-natal class, the midwife was describing the various bits and pieces that will get attached to you, including a catheter. There was mention of labour possibly taking hours - and in my head I couldn't help but wonder "So the catheter takes care of your needing to pee... but after spending hours pushing your guts out, who is to say you won't end up pooping the bed you're on?" A disgusting thought, sure. But a realistic one, You can't really do anything other than push and push and then push it some more. A-la-la-la-la-long a-la-la-la-la-long long li long long long! Err. Sorry about that. Momentarily got distracted!
Had to get this out of the way.
Anyway. Back to this crappy topic.
I started doing some research about what can be done to minimise the chances of any 'accidents' happening during childbirth, and the first answers I came across weren't reassuring at all. Most forums just had an "oh don't you worry about it, the medical staff is used to it and you will be too busy otherwise to be embarrassed" kind of approach.
Others seemed to imply that your body goes through this massive bowel evacuation movement a few days before labour. Others still advised to switch to liquids and watery soups the moment you notice you're about to go into labour to ensure that you evacuate the pipes before it is too late.
Nope, still not a satisfactory answer to me.
I also stumbled across someone mentioning Castor Oil. Upon looking this up, it turns out that it is believed Castor Oil can help induce labour if Baby is overdue. And this is done by triggering bowel cramps, thus making it an effective laxative. Upon reading further though, it turns out that Castor Oil can cause - and I quote - " painful cramps, fecal incontinence and explosive diarrhoea. Its action can go on for hours, sometimes unpredictably and powerfully causing an involuntary bowel movement at inconvenient locations and during sleep" [quoted from Wikipedia]. As effective as it may be, I'd rather not risk it.
Now I'm aware that different countries might vary slightly in their methods, so I decided to ask some local friends of mine who work in the medical industry. It has been confirmed to me that an enema is given to minimise the chances of things getting pretty stinky. Awesome! That has taken a shitload of concern off my mind.
A by-product possibility of labour is piles. A nurse friend of mine suggested to pack some piles cream in advance, just in case.
Once labour is over and done with, and Baby is born, it will be his/her shit you will have to put up with. Surprisingly enough, Baby Poo comes in a wide variety of colour, textures and smells. Yes, disturbing, and revolting. But, the next few years of your [and my] life will be so full of it that I needed to know the differences to be able to tell if something is wrong or not. Google, my old friend, helped me out with that. Here is a guide to different Baby Poo - opt for text-only, or full-blown visuals! Enjoy!
Sunday, 25 December 2011
I'll be going through changes
Becoming a parent is one hell of a big change. "No shit, Sherlock," I hear you say.
Seriously though. It is a HUGE change. If you previously were fine with living in an organised chaos, you will now have to get used to keeping the organised chaos out of toddler's reach. If you hated Xmas and the decorations and carols and all that jazz, you're screwed. You will now be expected to decorate your house, go overboard with gifts, set up Xmas stockings, suffer in silence and mentally envision the tragic death of all those people responsible for teaching your child all those horrible Xmas Carols. If you hated the idea of spending a day at the beach.. again, you're screwed. You will get to spend literally, a day at the beach, in the company of endless beach toy supplies, sun block, water mattresses, swimming aids, snorkeling gear, and more likely than not, a tantrum at the end of the day thrown as loudly as possible by an overtired child who doesn't want the day to end.
You will also get to annually be around dozens of screaming, sticky children, frantically trying to prevent them from destroying your house. Gods forbid you have a clown phobia! You'll be bound to be forced to face your phobia, for your child's sake. And, you will have to succumb into being The One To Sing The First Note Of 'Happy Birthday'. Over and over again.
The best part of it all? Getting to not only listen to the aforementioned annoying songs when they are justified, but also listening to them over and over again all year round.
Seriously though. It is a HUGE change. If you previously were fine with living in an organised chaos, you will now have to get used to keeping the organised chaos out of toddler's reach. If you hated Xmas and the decorations and carols and all that jazz, you're screwed. You will now be expected to decorate your house, go overboard with gifts, set up Xmas stockings, suffer in silence and mentally envision the tragic death of all those people responsible for teaching your child all those horrible Xmas Carols. If you hated the idea of spending a day at the beach.. again, you're screwed. You will get to spend literally, a day at the beach, in the company of endless beach toy supplies, sun block, water mattresses, swimming aids, snorkeling gear, and more likely than not, a tantrum at the end of the day thrown as loudly as possible by an overtired child who doesn't want the day to end.
You will also get to annually be around dozens of screaming, sticky children, frantically trying to prevent them from destroying your house. Gods forbid you have a clown phobia! You'll be bound to be forced to face your phobia, for your child's sake. And, you will have to succumb into being The One To Sing The First Note Of 'Happy Birthday'. Over and over again.
The best part of it all? Getting to not only listen to the aforementioned annoying songs when they are justified, but also listening to them over and over again all year round.
Saturday, 24 December 2011
If your child is an Asshat, it might not be your fault.
I don't get how some parents can plan out their child's upbringing and their life in advance. I often find myself thinking that I want to do things in this way or that way, but I then pause and tell myself that although I might wish to do so, Creature's character will determine whether that will be possible or not.
Perhaps, my not knowing Creature's gender yet helps me take a step back and come to the aforementioned realisation. I don't know about you, but I believe that a person's character is built up of qualities that the person is born with, as well as qualities acquired through life and the environment that the person grows up in. There is a whole philosophical debate about this, I happily found out. It made me accept that my personal view about the matter is not something that is merely personal scrambled thoughts, but a valid point. If you wish to read about it, here's a link to the Wikipedia Nature vs Nurture article.
I think that the most clear example of Nature vs Nurture can be seen in identical twin babies. If you ask the parents, they will be able to describe the two babies' characters as being quite different. And yet, they share the same exact genetics, and the same exact upbringing. They are exposed to the same things, day after day. So there must be some validity to the whole argument that a person is not born completely tabula rasa.
This whole concept is one thing to keep in mind when the metaphorical shit hits the metaphorical fan. It is a very common thing to hear people judge a person's parenting skills without knowing them when their child screws up. Parenting skills, or the lack of, are not entirely to blame. Parents can only do so much. We can equip the child with all the skills and moral values possible - but at the end of the day, their innate characteristics will also play a part in how they behave.
What I'm saying is this - you can do your best, but if your child is born with the characteristics of being a "little shit", and lets those characteristics cloud his judgement, then there isn't much you can do about it. [Which is why I tend to maintain that a person's age has got nothing to do with the amount of stupidity or asshattery they display. I will not excuse their behaviour "just because they are still young" and will still hold them responsible for their words/actions when it is clear that they should know better.]
Perhaps, my not knowing Creature's gender yet helps me take a step back and come to the aforementioned realisation. I don't know about you, but I believe that a person's character is built up of qualities that the person is born with, as well as qualities acquired through life and the environment that the person grows up in. There is a whole philosophical debate about this, I happily found out. It made me accept that my personal view about the matter is not something that is merely personal scrambled thoughts, but a valid point. If you wish to read about it, here's a link to the Wikipedia Nature vs Nurture article.
I think that the most clear example of Nature vs Nurture can be seen in identical twin babies. If you ask the parents, they will be able to describe the two babies' characters as being quite different. And yet, they share the same exact genetics, and the same exact upbringing. They are exposed to the same things, day after day. So there must be some validity to the whole argument that a person is not born completely tabula rasa.
This whole concept is one thing to keep in mind when the metaphorical shit hits the metaphorical fan. It is a very common thing to hear people judge a person's parenting skills without knowing them when their child screws up. Parenting skills, or the lack of, are not entirely to blame. Parents can only do so much. We can equip the child with all the skills and moral values possible - but at the end of the day, their innate characteristics will also play a part in how they behave.
What I'm saying is this - you can do your best, but if your child is born with the characteristics of being a "little shit", and lets those characteristics cloud his judgement, then there isn't much you can do about it. [Which is why I tend to maintain that a person's age has got nothing to do with the amount of stupidity or asshattery they display. I will not excuse their behaviour "just because they are still young" and will still hold them responsible for their words/actions when it is clear that they should know better.]
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