Thursday, 2 February 2012

The Hospital Diaries: Tears Are Falling

I don't remember the last time I cried for joy before Morgan was born.

The moment I heard her lusty cry, as soon as she was pulled out of my womb, my tears of fear changed into tears of joy. "Ros, tifla! Karrotta!" ("Ros, It is a girl! Carrot!") Said my cousin as she held her in front of me to see.

I laughed and cried for joy and relief, and saw my daughter clench her fist. All I could say was "Thank you" - I honestly have never felt more alive, nor happier, in my entire life. I was reborn the moment she was born. No longer was I the Maiden - I had now become the Mother.

I hate labels, usually. But. Mother is a label I wear proudly. Morgan makes even the most mundane task wonderful. Who would have thought changing a poopy nappy would be a happy occasion?

I fed her again this morning at about 7am, and after we finished feeding, I was just holding her in my arms, telling her how I feel about her and sharing some information about me and my hopes and dreams for her. For some reason, I took to calling her Pupilla - which is the pupil of one's eye. At one point I told her, "Inhobbok Pupilla tieghi" - "I love you, my pupil", and it happened. Her face lit up, and she smiled. Beamed, actually!

I know it is a meaningless smile right now - but, to think that my daughter smiled so gorgeously the moment I told her I love her.. It made me all teary-eyed. I cried for joy for the second time in just 3 days.

I thank the Goddess for having given her to me. She is perfect in my eyes - no matter what other people might say. Everyone keeps saying she is a beauty - and I agree. Doctors and medical staff are content with her health, and are doing their utmost to prove that everything indeed is perfect within her.

She is my all. I'm sitting here watching her sleep as I write all this, and it is enough to threaten a 3rd episode of joyful tears.


  1. She does not understand the words, but for sure she can feel and understand your joy and love :)
    Faith xxxx

  2. Adorable x infinity. I can't even imagine what it would be like to be a mom...I'm sure it is beyond words.