Monday, 13 February 2012

You Are My Dream

At times, I feel as if all this is just a dream. In the evening, after changing Morgan's nappy and feeding her, I get some alone time. Everyone, including Morgan, will be asleep, so I can go to the dining room and grab a bite, or a coffee, and read or watch tv or chat with a friend or three.

This is when I disconnect from reality, and I temporarily feel as if Morgan never was. It is strange. I don't feel happy, or sad, whenever this happens. It just feels normal, in a way.

Then, I touch my abdomen and feel the numbness, or run my fingers over the scar. Or even still, I spot a baby spit stain on my shirt. All of a sudden, I'm pulled back to reality, and I feel relieved.

Life wouldn't be worth living without my Fairy. I know, I know. Cliché. I mean it though. The moment she was born, I was reborn.

In just under an hour, it will be Valentine's Day here. Last year, my V-day was good - I had someone in my life with whom there was something in the making. This year far exceeds it though! The something-in-the-making led to Morgan. Even though I'm not in a romantic relationship, so to speak, I have my One True Love right here. Morgan, my Light Bringer, is the one person I can love and know it will not be unrequited. She far exceeds the love one can find with a partner. She is perfection to me. And yes, I'm smitten by my spawn. I would give anything for her, and yet I know it won't be required. At least, not yet.

Before she was born, I had question marks as to whether I'd be willing to give me life for her or not, should it be required. I can now safe say that I would - in a heartbeat, if not sooner.

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