Saturday, 14 January 2012

When Love and Death Embrace

Although I know the chances are pretty remote, I can't help but wonder - what if something goes wrong?  During birth I mean. Apparently it is a thought that has been on my mind long enough to work its way into my dreams.

During my last nap, I dreamt that for some reason, I needed to undergo an emergency Cesarean Section - and was put under general anaesthetic. I somehow found myself at my parents' house when I woke up, clueless as to what had happened.  Creature was nowhere to be seen and was told that s/he was at my grandma's house being babysat by someone - my brother's fiancee, I think.  I was insisting  that I wanted to see Creature and I kept getting told there was no rush and that I needed rest. I asked how they had been feeding Creature and they told me they breastfed her.  They didn't need me to be awake to do that it seems.  I complained even more saying I needed to see Creature and that I didn't even know if it was a girl or a boy.  They ruined the surprise by saying "A girl, of course" and then I woke up from my dream.  It sucked.

An element that is pretty popular in literature and film is Death during Childbirth - the death of either mother or child, and having to make the decision  who to save - or the death of one of them or even both.  It is not as common nowadays within the 'developed' world, however it is an issue that is still existent.  All it takes is something as simple as an infection, or an oversight.

I wonder how many people go into the whole Pregnancy experience and are aware that as unlikely as it may be,this could very well be the death of them.  Everyone seems to be concerned about the welfare of the child but fail to remember that they too are at risk.

It may sound wrong - hell, even to me it sounds wrong! - but in all honesty, if asked whether I'd be willing to die for Creature to live, I don't know what I would say.  I wish I could tell you that I'd say yes in a heartbeat.  I am not saying I wouldn't give up my life for his/hers, mind you.  I just don't know. A lot of people claim they would take a bullet for their loved ones, or just die for them in general.  Faced with the situation though, how many would actually keep true to their word?

What about stillbirth? It happens. I have had to deal with a fair amount of death in my life and some deaths were tougher than others when it came to dealing with the whole mourning process.  I have no idea how it might affect me if I  had to face this kind of situation.  I cannot even begin to imagine the pain parents go through when similar events occur.  Having successfully carried the pregnancy to full-term, only to be told that your child died...

I can only hope that things will turn out well.


  1. An ugly truth but I guess one that one would rather not brood too much about and cross that bridge if they ever get to it which may well not be the case. Just keep doing your best in the meantime.

  2. i just recently read an article about a teenager who stopped her chemo so that her baby would come out healthy. i can't imagine someone not being careful about the whole baby thing if she knew she had cancer. i really don't know what i would do in that position, but i suppose every woman who has a baby runs that risk..